Create your own FACEinHOLE
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
*WHAM!* I am Hateful
It's been a minute...
This past Sunday evening, a guy that I used to know was tragically shot and killed. Steve Gray was 27 years old with a 3 year old son. Steve worked in housekeeping at North Greenville last year for a little while and I met him through my roommate Theron. I have to admit that I was not so fond of the guy. For some reason he just got on my nerves, and I regret to say that I made fun of him a lot over the past few months. Not to justify my disrespectful and cruel attitude towards Steve, but he was not exactly the smartest guy when it came to the decisions he made. I won't go into detail and talk about all the dumb decisions he made and what not because the Lord knows that I have probably made dumber decisions in my life and He has just blessed me to keep me from getting killed because of my bad choices.
God really slapped me in the face when I heard about Steve's death. I thought back and realized that I had never actually determined whether or not he was a Christian and had accepted Jesus as his savior. On top of that, I made fun of the guy and definitely did not love him as God calls us to love everyone. This is the message I deciphered from God concerning this situation...
God: "What are you doing? How are you using all the knowledge I have given you over the course of your Christian life? To benefit only yourself? How self-centered! Don't ever let your own ambitions and desires blur your long-term vision of the ultimate goals that I have set before you. I don't care if you didn't like Steve, I have commanded you to LOVE your enemies and to PRAY for them that they may receive salvation through Jesus!"
Disrespectful and degrading talk about other people is one of my biggest weaknesses, and I'm so thankful that God has convicted me about this and has shown me how weak and failing I am. As frustrating as it is, I need to get things back into perspective very often and redirect my focus on God instead of myself. I truly hope to continue to allow Him to show me these things and work through me to help me love and pray for someone I may not like.
This past Sunday evening, a guy that I used to know was tragically shot and killed. Steve Gray was 27 years old with a 3 year old son. Steve worked in housekeeping at North Greenville last year for a little while and I met him through my roommate Theron. I have to admit that I was not so fond of the guy. For some reason he just got on my nerves, and I regret to say that I made fun of him a lot over the past few months. Not to justify my disrespectful and cruel attitude towards Steve, but he was not exactly the smartest guy when it came to the decisions he made. I won't go into detail and talk about all the dumb decisions he made and what not because the Lord knows that I have probably made dumber decisions in my life and He has just blessed me to keep me from getting killed because of my bad choices.
God really slapped me in the face when I heard about Steve's death. I thought back and realized that I had never actually determined whether or not he was a Christian and had accepted Jesus as his savior. On top of that, I made fun of the guy and definitely did not love him as God calls us to love everyone. This is the message I deciphered from God concerning this situation...
God: "What are you doing? How are you using all the knowledge I have given you over the course of your Christian life? To benefit only yourself? How self-centered! Don't ever let your own ambitions and desires blur your long-term vision of the ultimate goals that I have set before you. I don't care if you didn't like Steve, I have commanded you to LOVE your enemies and to PRAY for them that they may receive salvation through Jesus!"
Disrespectful and degrading talk about other people is one of my biggest weaknesses, and I'm so thankful that God has convicted me about this and has shown me how weak and failing I am. As frustrating as it is, I need to get things back into perspective very often and redirect my focus on God instead of myself. I truly hope to continue to allow Him to show me these things and work through me to help me love and pray for someone I may not like.
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